My Life as a Russian Novel: A Memoir

Emmanuel Carrère offers a candid memoir examining love, betrayal, and self-deception. The author, known for his psychological narratives, turns his analytical eye inward after years of studying others' struggles with themselves. Carrère undertakes a film project in Russia while beginning a new relationship in Paris, hoping these pursuits will provide escape from the darker themes of his previous work. Instead, he finds intimacy difficult and becomes confronted with his own inner life. Set between Paris and Kotelnich, a small post-Soviet town, the memoir traces two central preoccupations: the disappearance of his Russian grandfather and his erotic obsession with a woman he loves but repeatedly harms. Through elegant prose, Carrère weaves together travelogue and confession, exploring how people construct schemes to avoid themselves and the consequences that follow.